


Dib's stupid love note

by LucretiaMyReflection (orphan_account)



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Boyfriends, Cross-Posted on Wattpad, Cute, Denial of Feelings, Drama, Eventual Happy Ending, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Frenemies Dib & Zim (Invader Zim), Idiots in Love, Its so cute its stupid, Its so stupid its cute, M/M, My First Fanfic, My First Work in This Fandom, Oblivious Dib and Zim (Invader Zim), Some Humor, Some Plot, This Is STUPID, Work In Progress, Writing this makes me happy, ZaDr
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-20 17:47:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 14,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20679410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/LucretiaMyReflection
Summary: Someone wrote Dib a love note. Dib mistakenly thinks it's from Zim. Zim pretends to befriend his enemy in order to find out what the "secret note" means.~Work in progress~





	1. Chapter 1

Why, Zim wonders, leaning against the bus window. He had big plans. Plans that couldn't possibly fail. Instead he would be spending entire weekend on a school trip with all his weakling classmates. All that time wasted when he could be plotting earth's destruction!

But maybe it wouldn't be so much of a waste. They would be taking a trip to a space museum and he had to admit he was a little impressed. The human race was getting smarter. They were gaining more knowledge about aliens and life outside their own planet. He could use this opportunity to find out how much they know. Their information could be useful. But it would be so boring.

"Hey! How are you?" Says a familiar voice sitting next to him.

"Gir! What are you doing?" He asks, surprised as he turns to see the robot without its dog suit. 

"I'm sitting!" Gir replies happily.

"Why you..." Zim groans, preparing throw the robot out the window at any second. "Why aren't you in your disguise? Are you trying to trying to get us killed?!"

Gir thinks hard, trying come up with answer. "I like sitting!" 

Zim shakes his head. He should've left the stupid chunk of metal back at his home planet. But for now, Gir is an important part of his mission. However, it's been a while since he heard from his leaders and since Zim hasn't completed his mission yet, he fears maybe they forgot about him. After all, there's a million other Irkens, most likely the tallest ones haven't even bothered to remember his name. But he can't doubt them! Zim will obey their command, he must trust them. 

"Look, look, theres your boyfriend!" Gir squeals, snapping Zim out of his thoughts.

"Huh? What?!" he blinks and looks around. What could Gir be talking about? The only thing Zim sees are the filthy weak scum that inhabit his future planet. The planet he will take over, once the humans are destroyed. He laughs a little, amused by the robot's choice of words. None of these pathetic earthlings are worthy of being Zim's mate. 

"Don't be ridiculous, Zim doesn't have a..."

"There, there! Let's sit by him!" The robot exclaims and points to the front seat, where his one and only enemy sits by himself, deeply concentrating on a book. With head phones stuffed in his ears, Dib can barely hear them though Zim wouldn't doubt if he was spying on him.

"No, that's Dib." 

"He's your boyfriend!" Gir grins. "You love him!"

"Love?" Zim frowns, watching Dib's moments from across the bus. With a small smile the human turn a page and stares with at his book with intense fascination. Taking note of the human's appearance, he looks much nicer than usual. He looks happy, and seems perfectly fine ignoring everyone else on the bus, as if he's in his own little world. 

Zim scoffs. "What is love? Zim does not know this love you speak of."

Gir tilts his head in confusion. "Are you sure?"

"Yes!" Zim raises his voice, glaring at the robot before shooting his eyes back to Dib.

Today it seems the human is being quiet. So quiet that Zim hadn't noticed he was on the bus eariler. If he did he would've said something funny, maybe insult his dumb haircut. Which wasn't totally dumb. It suited him and unlike most humans he had a perfectly normal face, which wasn't ugly and Zim liked looking at it for long periods of time.

"The Dib human should be yelling at me by now." Zim growls, suddenly realizing that his enemy is most likely ignoring him. They hadn't said anything to each other all day. Which is unusual for the two, since they are always fighting and arguing. So why is Dib thing not noticing him?

Expecting the human to say something, Zim stares and waits. Then suddenly he sees something small fly through the air. Whatever it is, it hits the back of Dib's head and lands on his seat.

"Who threw that?" Dib demands, turing around with anger in his eyes.

All the students in the back giggle with laughter and though Zim can't help himself from laughing too, it is a good question. Who threw it, Zim wonders as Dib picks up the object. He watches as the human unfolds it and reads what's scribbled on the small crumbled up wad of paper. Of course, it's a note, Zim thinks, and as he does he notices Dib looking up to meet his eyes.

The human's face turns red but before Zim can open his mouth the paper is tossed at him and it lands in his lap as a tiny crushed up ball.

"Very funny Zim!" he shouts.

"Your face is funny!" Zim yells, excited to get a response from the boy.

With a irritated sigh Dib turns around his seat and shoves his head phones in his ears. The human, once again, continues to ignore him.

Disappointed, Zim slumps back in his seat and sighs, looking at the paper in his lap. He thinks for a moment, curious, and picks it up. Who could it from? Who threw it? Why did they throw it? Why would they write this to Dib-thing?

Maybe Dib is teaming up with others, conspiring to take down the Irken empire, he thinks, slowly opening the note and wondering what's written inside. Could this be their plans to stop his mission?

He takes a deep breath, preparing himself for what he's about to see, and reads.

"Do you heart me, check yes or no?" Zim stares, confused at the two blank empty boxes on the page. He rereads the note over and over, gripping the paper with frustration.

"What does this mean? Gir! What does this mean!?" he grumbles. 

"Ooh, ooh, it's a secret code!" The robot exclaims, popping it's head out from under the seat.

"Hmm. Secret code, eh? Well! Not to worry! The earthlings plan to destroy my mission will be found out eventually, Zim will not be fooled!" Zim laughs as he neatly folds it half and hands it over to the robot. "Gir! Hold on to this. We may need to decipher it later."


	2. Chapter 2

Food was provided by the teacher, however she forgot to put ice in the food cooler so now everyone was left with spoiled canned meat and lukewarm bottled water for lunch.

What was she thinking, Zim growls, gripping his plastic fork with anger. Dumb humans, so irresponsible! 

With a sigh, he takes his eyes away from the pile of garbage and tosses the paper plate out the window.

Everyone on the bus is miserable. It's been a long drive and this is the first time they'd stopped for a break. Someone got sick so the teacher pulled aside the road and was now debating if she should cancel the museum trip because of the student's health. Hopefully she would.

Looking around and trying to distract himself his eyes fall to the front seat, where Dib is still reading, not bothering to touch the food. He pitied the poor human. Unlike himself, who could could survive perfectly fine without it, human bodies required human food. Of course Irkens eat, but Dib's body need more than he does.

Zim looks away, trying to find something else to stare at. Dib has a nice body. But Dib's also dumb. 

Well no actually, Dib is actually pretty smart. 

For a human, Zim scoffs. 

Although he has the highest grades out of everyone in school and he's the only one who knows who Zim truly is. Thinking about it now, his intelligence is really astounding and quite attractive. Out of everyone on this stupid planet, Dib is probably his equal. The both of them are very different but very much alike. Alien and human. Good verses evil. Both superior geniuses.

If Dib wanted, maybe they could take over earth. That would be nice. It would be just the two of them and everyone on the planet bowing at their feet. They could rule together. They could...

No! That would never happen! Even if Dib was smart and attractive, he would never befriend his enemy! Dib doesn't even like him! And why would Zim like Dib? He's always ruining his plans and getting in the way!

"I shouldn't care." Zim grumbles to himself and as he does, Dib looks up from his book and stares suspiciously in his direction. Noticing this, Zim quickly grabs his water bottle and pretends to drink from it. "Oh boy this earth water is delicious, as a human I sure do love drinking!"

"Zim." Did glares.

"Dib." 

"I know what your doing." Dib squints his eyes.

"Eh? What do you mean? Zim is just another ordinary human boy!" He waves the bottle around but none of the other kids are paying attention. They all know Zim is human and Dib is crazy so there's no point trying to argue any more.

Dib sets the book down and sighs. "You," he mutters, slowly pronouncing each word. "Wrote. Me. A. Note." He raises an eyebrow at him. "Correct?"

"Huh?" Zim asks, confused before remembering the piece of paper that had been thrown eariler. "Oh, that note."

"Don't play dumb! Just tell me."

He is talking about the note, Zim realizes. This could be an important clue to discovering the human's plans, to figuring out the secret code! "And what would Dib thing like Zim to tell him?" The alien says, curious.

The human goes quiet for a few seconds. Then quietly mutters something he can't hear. "What was that?" Zim asks, leaning across the seat. 

"Nothing." Dib grumbles.

"Huh?"

"Forget it!"

"No, Human! Zim commands you to speak! Answer me!"

"Zim." Dib sighs again. "Do you want to be..." the human pauses, thinking carefully about his words. "Friends?"

"Friends?" Zim repeats with wide eyes. What did that mean? Was that a hint or did the Dib human genuinely want to be friends? Could they even be friends? Zim didn't have friends. 

After all, it was his job to destroy earth and that included whatever lived on the pathetic little planet. The human race just so happened to be in his way of that. The almighty tallests told him anyone who wasn't Irken was an enemy. So he'd believed in his leaders, never doubting them. 

But having a friend? Someone loyal, someone who will always be by his side, someone who will help him destroy stuff and take over the planet?

Were the tallest ones wrong? Was friendship between humans and aliens possible? If Dib was anything else besides human, would they be friends?

He had to admit, being on earth was lonely and boring. Aside from Gir, he didn't really have anyone in his life and Dib was always trying to ruin the fun. 

Hm. Now that he thinks about it, Dib also doesn't have friends. Sure he's got his human family, but the Dib sibling doesn't really talk to him. At school everyone either ignores him or thinks he's weird.

What did this mean, being friends? Could this be the enemy surrendering? Or could this be a trap?

"So..." Zim hums. "Dib human wants to befriend the great and powerful Zim, eh?"

It's too good to be true. Dib is up to no good, he must be aware of Zim's plans! For now, Zim will pretend. He will accept this request of friendship and use it to his advantage, to find out Dib's plans and destroy him.

"Zim will allow-" 

"Yes or no?!" Dib shouts.

"Yes!" The invader smiles. "Zim accepts."

"Good." Dib nods, then grabs his stuff and moves from his seat over to the invaders.

"Dib thing." Zim mumbles, staying very still as the human scoots beside him. The human is rather close, he notices, yet he tries to not stare at all. "Who gave you permission to sit by Zim?"

Dib doesn't say anything as he reaches for his now suddenly shaking hand. Zim watches with fear, wondering if he should or shouldn't reach back.

Accidentally, their fingers touch and for a quick second it feels like a shock of lighting. Both of them jump and look at each other, but turn away seeing the other's eyes.

"No one." Dib says sharply, now holding the alien's hand in his own.

Zim watches, his face heating up at the feeling of the human's skin on him. "Fine, Dib human, you are given permission. You may touch Zim." He says, looking out the window to avoid the boy beside him.

So this is friendship, he thinks to himself. Being fake friends with Dib, it can't be that hard.


	3. Chapter 3

As the bus drove down the road, the two continued sitting together. Luckily the school trip was canceled due to several students throwing up. Zim was glad. It had been a long day and he couldn't stand being on the bus with the sick kids any longer. 

Yet he had a weird feeling inside. 

Everyone would be driven back home so he wouldn't be able to sit and enjoy the company of the Dib human. Not like he was enjoying being with Dib human or anything! But it was nice, the feeling of Dib by his side, the two of them being by each other without arguing or insulting.

No longer fighting. Just being friends.

Except they aren't, Zim reminds himself. Dim is up to something, plotting to stop Zim's plans of taking over earth. But what is it, he thinks, looking over at his new fake friend. 

For some reason the human rests against him, eyes closed and small snores escaping his mouth. Even though he didn't give the human permission to fall asleep, he doesn't really mind.

Dib is cozy, warm, and being next him is oddly relaxing. When he's like this he's not intimidating. Of course humans aren't a threat to Zim, he fears no human! Dib, however, is tall, and when he leans over Zim with glaring eyes and a cold stare, the human looks so irresistible and dominant.

The thought makes him shiver and want to punch Dib in his stupid face.

Now that the human is closer than ever, Zim discovers trying not to look at him is hard.

"Earthling." The irken whispers, trying not to startle his friend. "I command you to wake up."

"Invader..." The sleeping human mumbles in response. He's dreaming, Zim realizes.

"Dib thing?" he says a little louder, nudging his shoulder and hoping it'll wake him up. Zim can't help but wonder if maybe the human Dib is dreaming...about him? Irkens don't need sleep like humans do, so he's never experienced a dream before.

"Stupid alien." Dib says beside him. Feeling his face warm up, Zim looks at the human, curious.

He could be dreaming the mighty powerful Zim taking over earth and destroying the stupid planet. Or trying to ruin his mission, which is most likely, knowing Dib, Zim thinks, watching the snoring human.

Then a thought comes to mind. What if he is dreaming about them? Dib and Zim? Zim and Dib, together.

"Us." The irken whispers, liking the strange sound yet trying to ignore the feeling he gets from it. 

Why does thinking about Dib thinking about the two of them make him so happy? Dib is a filthy human, Zim shouldn't care about him. It's not like dib thinks about him all the time. 

He's just another problem getting in the way of his misson. Once he has discovered Dib's plans he won't need to be friends with the human anymore.

"Dib thing, open your eyes!" Zim says, more louder now.

Not really responding, Dib makes a small noise, and suddenly, moves himself into a comfortable position to lie down on the seat. Zim stares with shock, unsure what to make of the situation.

Dib is close. Too close. But this is what friends do, he thinks as the earthling boy lays his head in his lap. Dib is showing his friendly affection. Zim must return the affectionate act of friendship!

Gently, he reaches to pet him. The human is soft, Zim notes as he carefully runs his hands through Dib's hair. It's a strange feeling, somewhat calming. He's never felt so comfortable being with him like this and they've never been this close. 

Closing his eyes, Zim relaxes. He's never been this close to anyone before, not even others irken. It's...nice.

Out of nowhere, Dib yawns, and with fear, the alien yanks his hand back.

"Dib thing!"

"Oh, Zim." Dib slowly blinks, adjusting to the light on the bus. Tired, he wipes his eyes and looks for a second to see the nervous alien before him. Quickly he sits up. 

Zim turns away, his face hiding towards the window. "What is it, human?!"

"I didn't say anything!!" Dib stutters, grabbing his backpack and leaning back in his seat.

"Neither did zim!" Zim replies, flustered and feeling his face burn.

"Good!" Dib blurts out.

"Great!" Zim shouts back. 

The stupid Dib human is better when he doesn't talk Zim thinks, ready to insult him, but stops himself before speaking. Is that really true, he wonders. Does he really mean that? Dib isn't stupid and Zim doesn't really hate it when he talks. As a matter of fact, the irken really likes his voice.

With Zim's eyes glued to the window and Dib's face buried in a book, the two are silent for the rest of drive home. No one speaks until they arrive at the bus stop and all the neighborhood kids quickly exit, cheering with relief.

Zim is the last to get off and doesn't notice Gir following after him. He's too busy running to catch up with his Dib friend.

"Dib! Dib! Dib, Dib, Dib, Dib!!!"

Finally, Dib stops and turns around. 

"What?!"

"Are you forgetting something?" Zim glares.

The human stares at him, thinking very carefully about what he could've possibly missed.

Zim huffs, stomping up to him in his boots. "The Dib friend must say goodbye." He demands, pointing him. "The great Zim commands it!"

"Right." Dib shakes his head. "Okay." And with very little enthusiasm, he waves, and turns around to leave. "Good day Zim."

"What!? No!" Zim exclaims, chasing after as his human friends walks away. "How dare you, that is not how Dib should say goodbye!"

"See you at school!" Dib calls out.

"Do not think you will get away with this!" Zim shouts, running as fast as he can and jumping in front of him before the human can reach his lawn. 

"What?!" Dib gasps at the unexpected move, taking a few steps back.

With all his strength Zim wraps his arms around him, squeezing the human's soft slim body and causing a small sound of surprise to escape him. 

"Zim!" Dib squeaks, standing still for an awkward second before sighing with exhaustion.

Placing his hands on gently on the alien, he returns the goodbye hug.


	4. Chapter 4

"Gir!" Zim growls from the kitchen table, all while staring at the currently ripped out photo of Dib. It was a picture he'd torn from the school year book, which he still kept incase he needed any important information on his human classmates.

The book wasn't very useful, but it had Dib's picture and it was a good place for Zim to hide papers and sticky notes of his evil invader plans. If Dib broke into his home he would never guess to look in the pages of the old year book that was always lying around in plain site.

Zim also kept information on Dib. Which was why all files, random junk, other stuff about the human he'd collected over the years was lying in front of him on the table.

The irken leans in his seat and scans back and forth between the old photo and a stack of loose papers revealing everything he knows about the Dib human.

He waits for his robot servant, and thinks.

What on Irk was Dib doing earlier? What made him think he had the right to rest his head on the invader's lap? Why was he making those strange noises? Was it just a human sleep thing or was he trying to say Zim's name? And what was he, the great Zim himself, doing eariler?! He put his hands on him! A human! For a good bye hug!

Was he sad to see the human leave? Ha, no! That's just what friends do. At least it's what fake ones do, from what he knows about friendship, anyways. He's never had friends, but he can't get too close with this relationship.

"Gir!" Zim shouts again. This time the robot bounces into the room, just as commanded. "Yes sir!?" Gir jumps and salutes with a goofy grin.

"The Dib human is playing some type of game!" He picks up the photo of his enemy and glares. In the picture, he doesn't look too bad. "But Zim will not be fooled, We must find out what he's up to."

"Oh, him!" The robot squeals, pointing to the picture. "That's your boyfriend!"

"No!" Zim groans. "Don't be gross Gir!"

"But Dib is a boy." Dib squints his eyes in confusion. "And Dib is a friend?"

"The human and I are enemies, we are not friends!" Zim snarls, although he has to secretly agree. As far as he knows, Dib is a boy, and they are kinda friends. Technically fake friends, but that's not really being friends. Its pretending.

Still confused, Gir scratches his head. "I don't know."

"Do you not understand?"

Without saying anything, the robot shakes the answer no.

"Gir..." Zim groans again, hiding his face in his hands. Must he really explain it? Dim and Zim, they are still enemies! Has that not been obvious?! Or did Gir think they were friends the whole time? 

If so, they might as well put a sign on each other's backs that says best enemies forever, make it well known to the world.

"The human is planning to take me down! For the sake of my mission and all of the irken empire, it is important that I, Zim, must gain his trust, play along with his games, and the moment he least expects it, I, the great irken Zim, will destroy him!" He says, and roars with evil laughter. 

The robot joins him too, although Gir is still not sure what his master talking about.

"Now." He orders, holding out his hand. "Give Zim the note."

"Uh.." The robot stops and thinks.

"The note!" 

"What note?"

"Dib's note, the secret note!" he snaps. "The one Zim gave you eariler!"

"Hm.." Gir hums, lost in his own little thoughts. Suddenly the robot jumps up and down with excitement. "Ooh, I know! I know!" He waves his tiny hands in the air.

"Come on, where is it?!" Zim demands impatiently. "Where is the secret note?"

"Dib!" Gir says with a innocent smile and a happy spin. "Dib's your boyfriend! Lets call him!" 

"NO!" Zim shouts, once again covering his face. "No." His voice lower now, he takes a deep breath and looks to the robot. "Gir..." he says slowly, trying to control his anger. "What have you done with the Dib human's note?"

"I knew you liked him! He smells pretty!"

Zim stares in disbelief. The irken just explained all of this! Did Gir really lose the note? How dare the robot assume that Zim is in like with the Dib human! They are not mates, Dib is not pretty!

Well actually, Dib does smell kind of pretty.

"Go. Leave Zim be!" He grumbles, too frustrated to continue the conversation.

"Yes sir!" Cheerfully, the robot skips to another room and sings. "Zim and Dib, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" 

"Sitting?!" Zim gasps, watching him leave with a shocked expression. "With Dib?"

How dare Gir say such awful words! The great irken would never do such a thing! Never, not with a filthy human!

"Zim does not wish to be sitting in a tree!!" He shouts, slamming his fist against the table. "Zim and Dib are not..." He starts to yell, but it's too late for him to be heard, Gir is already gone.

The robot thinks Zim likes Dib. But Zim does not like Dib! Right?

Feeling his face burn, he stares down at the photo in front of him and smashes his teeth together with a snarl. Yes, he convinces. He hates Dib. 

Ha, as he would ever sit in a tree with his enemy! They are not mates and will never be together!

But Gir believes elsewise. That could be dangerous, it could ruin his mission! If the tallest ones get the impression he's with a human he'll never be allowed to set foot on his planet again!

Zim must do research, find out information, learn more about Dib thing and their relationship of the friends.

"Dib." He growls, talking to himself. "Zim does not like you!"


	5. Chapter 5

"I'm home." Dib sighs, trying to ignore Gaz as he walks past her in front of the tv.

"Glad your back son!" His dad welcomes him from the kitchen, though he's too busy making toast to ask how his day was.

"Hey Dib." His sister unhappily greets him. "Weren't you on the trip with your boyfriend?"

"I don't have a boyfriend." He mutters, more to convince himself than Gaz. 

What happened on earlier today made him really confused. Zim threw a note, to which Dib didn't answer. However, when Dib asked Zim if he wanted to be friends, he said yes. So what did that mean?   
They held hands. Dib fell asleep in Zim's lap. Zim chased him down for a goodbye hug. 

That what people in relationships do right? Be affectionate and touchy? So... does that mean... dating? Or friends?

"Yeah," Gaz scoffs and rolls her eyes. "That so called alien kid? Right, whatever."

"He's an alien, I'm not gonna say it again! I don't like Zim that way!" Dib shouts back to his sister, slamming the door as he finally makes it to his room.

However, Gaz is right. He won't completely admit it, but he does like Zim that way. And as much as he wants to save the earth from its destruction, he also wants a boyfriend. It just so happens to be that the only person he wants to be boyfriends with is trying to cause earth's destruction.

Dib sighs and flops down on his bed, remembering what happened earlier and thinking what he knows he shouldn't be thinking about. The warmth of his body when he snuggles against him, the way he feels when he holds the alien in his arms, Zim's smell, his touch.

Being attracted to aliens doesn't help. He finds them fascinating. Sure, he'd only seen fictional ones before, like on tv and the movies. But that was until Zim, who he knew from the very beginning, was part of a dangerous space species that could potentially destroy the planet.

When he first laid eyes on him, the feeling was instant. Attraction, and fear. But now better knowing him, it's easy to see that Zim is only a pretty little threat. And Zim is so short, Dib thinks to himself with a chuckle, that if he really wanted, he could stop him by just using one hand.

Though his alien technology is well advanced and his exploding devices may be a danger, it's nothing Dib can't stop with a few gadgets and guns of his own. But Zim is all talk and no action, if he really wanted everyone on earth dead he would've done it by now. Zim is tiny and non threating, but he has the weapons, he has the mind, and the ability, if he tries hard enough.

So why, Dib wonders. Why hasn't Zim done it yet? Is it because of him?

They are always getting into fights, always trying to stop each other. Zim hates him and would never give up his mission. He wouldn't betray his leaders, he wouldn't fall in love with a gross human. Even if they were dating, Zim would still destroy earth.

Earth's destruction. That why they are enemies, that why he should hate Zim.

"Why?" Dib grumbles, shoving the pillow over his face in attempts to suffocate. Why can't he like someone else instead? Why can't he fall in love with a nice pretty human girl who doesn't have the desire to kill everyone on earth? Why does it have to be Zim?

"Son!" His dad announces, knocking on his door and letting himself in despite Dib's many complaints of him entering his room unwelcomed. "I heard you from the other side of the house, it sounded like you were dying! What's seems to be the problem?" 

"Nothing." Dib mumbles from the pillow.

"You can tell me anything! Surely it's nothing I can't fix, with science!"

"I don't think you can fix love with science."

"Well son, when a man loves a woman-"

"No, dad!" Dib groans. "He's an alien. I like him but he wants to destroy earth. He gave me a note and I don't know what it means. I don't know if he likes me back! "

"Oh!" The father laughs. "Don't worry son, I'm sure he feels the same as you do him!"

"Really dad?" Dib removes the pillow with a hopeful look in his eyes.

"Why yes! It's completely normal to have imaginary alien love interests! I remember when I was your age I was also delusional! But you'll never find out how he feels unless you try!"

"Gee, thanks dad..." Dib sighs at the advice and the professor leaves with a smile, glad to help his son out. But being called delusional isn't really helping Dib's situation.

Love sucks. The world sucks. Everyone thinks he's crazy. No one believes him about Zim being a alien. Dib's not sure if he believes Zim likes him.

He gets up from his bed, and leaves, deciding he needs to get out of the house. Fresh air might clear his mind. A nice walk in the park, maybe, he thinks as he heads out the front door and down the sidewalk.

After a long walk, he finally comes to a conclusion.

"Maybe, I do need to try." he says to himself, trying to cheer up. "Yeah...I need to know what zim is thinking! I will find out how he feels!"


	6. Chapter 6

Zim planned to stalk Dib for more information but he wasn't expecting it to rain.

He curses as he enters the library building, knowing that he can't go back out until its over, and hoping he can leave later before the human finds out hes spying on him.

Today there's no school and recently around this time of the day, this is where Dib goes. He'd figured out his schedule, lucky enough, and he'd been doing this for a quite a while. Usually he'd hide outside a window, far away where Dib can't see him. But now, behind a shelf, he watches from a very near distance.

It's risky being this close up, but at least he can get a better view.

Zim squints his eyes at the book his Dib friend is holding. "Relationships 101: how to get a guy to like you." He mouths to himself, reading off the cover.

Did this have something to do with what the Dib was saying yesterday? The human was unaware that he followed him and Zim had overheard everything he said: I need to know what zim is thinking, I need to know how Zim feels. What did that mean?

Oh wait! It's because he knows Zim is on to his little plan, and he wants to learn more about Zim's mission, know what he's thinking so he can can stop him, right? Although it doesn't explain why does he want to know the invaders feelings. Feelings about what? Zim feels a lot of things and he feels things about Dib too.

"He's reading, to strengthen our fake friend relationship." The irken whispers, trying to ignore the sudden thoughts.

The what if thought of Dib actually caring about his feelings. The pesky thought that he really really wants Dib to care and share his feelings. And the painful thought that Dib most likely doesn't.

"I must study too!" He looks around the isles. The fine art of flirting, a book from the romance section, catches his eye. He grabs it and scans the back of the book, unaware as the human gets up from the table and heads in his direction. Dib, still reading as he walks, hasn't noticed him either.

Seems like an instruction guide, Zim thinks to himself as he skims through the pages. It might be useful on helping him manipulate the enemy. 

Step one, he reads to himself. Be friendly. Already done that. Step two, know what he wants. That's easy, he knows everything about Dib. Step three, show your vulnerability and enthusiasm. Interesting... Step four, don't be afraid to laugh. 

After that, the irken narrows his eyes and flips fast through the book for any other advice. The steps only get harder and harder, he frowns and realizes that this might not work after all. But before he can return it to its shelf, one of the chapters catches his eye.

One of the most important steps is to use flattery. Find something you like about your man and let him know him how you feel. Men like to feel important and appreciated, complimenting him may increase your relationship and might make him feel the same.

His Dib? Feel the same? Zim blushes, quickly closing the book. If that's true, maybe he can get him to run away from earth, they could live in his ship and travel through space, wouldn't that be a dream.

He takes a step backwards, and suddenly someone tall accidentally bumps into him. With anger in his eyes, he turns, ready to scream out at the moron whoever dared touch him, but only comes face to face with no other than his friend enemy.

"Dib!" The irken gasps, holding the book closely. 

The human blinks, eyes wide with surprise. Now realizing Dib can see the cover, Zim shoves it behind his back. But it's too late, Dib thing has already eyed what was in his hands.

"Hello." The human adjusts his glasses and quickly looks away. "Zim."

"Well, well, well!" Zim laughs, trying not to sound awkward. "If it isn't the Dib friend! How odd, chances seeing you here." 

"You were stalking me, weren't you?" 

Zim rolls his eyes. "Mere coincidence."

Then, as Dib says something he ignores, probably along the lines of yeah right whatever, Zim remembers the advice from the chapters and a idea comes to mind.

"Lucky me, that I've run into you, human." Zim says, putting the book away and taking a step forward. "I now demand that you walk me home."

"What, why?..." Dib steps backward. 

"Because!" The irken complains, ready to list off every single reason why Dib most definitely should. Because Zim said so. Because Zim demands it.

However, Zim, having other plans, steps closer in attempts to push him. In Dib's defense, the alien is grabbed by the shirt and collapses along with, trapping the human between himself and the shelf.

Their eyes widen, both staring with surprise. Zim hadn't expected this to happen.

"I'm staying here!" Dib's voice stutters.

"Take me home, earthling!" Zim glares, pressing his body against him. 

"No, get off!" The human says, though he makes no attempt to escape or push Zim away.

"You will take Zim home." Zim's voice growls slightly. "Because." He says, running a hand over the human's chest. Dib gasps at the touch.

"It would please Zim." Finding where his friend's heart is, he places it there and looks up at him with innocent blinking eyes. "Dib" He stares, finding his own heart also beating rapidly. "Zim... needs you."

Face reddening, Dib opens his mouth and tries to breath. Or speak. Or make some kind of noise that doesn't sound like he's dying. He swallows nervously.

Hoping he'll say yes and to convince some more, the irken nuzzles his face against him and wraps his arms around the human's frame. Gir is right, Zim thinks, relaxing into the warmth. Dib does smell pretty.

He stays there for only a couple seconds, though it feels like hours for the two of them, before finally he lifts his head and looks into the human's eyes.

"So..." he asks. "Will you be walking Zim home?"


	7. Chapter 7

"Zim is greatful for your sacrifice." Zim says from underneath the human's lengthy coat. He's referring to the rain, as earlier Dib had given him it, since it was just big enough so that the alien wouldn't get wet. Fortunately for the pitiful human the rain stopped.

"You should be honored, Zim does not bother touching human filth clothing. Although, this fabric smells like Dib, Zim will keep it." 

"Kinda like it on you, looks good." Dib smiles.

"Of course it does, don't be ridiculous!" Zim says, hiding a blush from behind the coat and wondering why on irk the human has that dumb happy look. 

"It brings Zim memories of your sickening face!"

"Good. So then, you'll always be thinking about me?"

"Why would Zim want a stupid coat to think about you, when Zim could be with you, Dib?" Remembering some advice from the flirting book, he adds with a mischievous smirk, "Maybe Zim wants to be with you, huh Dib? Ever think about that?" Zim playfully nudges him. 

The enemy says nothing for almost a minute, and with that Zim almost takes a step back with fear and realization.

Zim wants to be with Dib?!

He quickly tries taking back what he said. "Of course I, the great Zim, would never-"

"Actually," Dib finally speaks. He stops and faces him, as does Zim, who just looks at the ground and snuggles the coat for its warmth. He also comes to the realization that he really likes it and doesn't want to take it off.

"I want-" Dib pauses for a second. It only makes the invader increasingly nervous, knowing that Dib wants something and whatever sentence he's about to finish Zim needs to know. He's dying to know, it could be about his mission. It could be about him.

Does Dib want him!? What would he want with him? Dib wants to destroy him? Dib wants to save earth? Dib wants to stop Zim?

Words, Zim screams inside his own head, use words! Spit it out, just say something! What is it, human?!

"Hello, Dib." A voice interrupts, and Zim turns, spotting a girl, whom hes never met, walking over. She's probably from their school but why would she approach them?

Silent, Dib's eyes narrow at her. She returns the look. Neither of them say anything, but just seeing them glare at each other makes Zim's blood boil. 

Zim stares at her with hate, wishing he had something to shoot at her face, and hoping she'll take her eyes off him. 

Stay away from his enemy, don't look at him, he is Zim's.

The girl scoffs, muttering something to Dib as she purposely bumps him with her shoulder. He hits the sidewalk with a pained noise, and as the girl walks away with laughter, Dib gives her another glare.

Zim burns and shakes with rage. Is Dib seeing someone? A new enemy? Who is she? Zim must know! Why did she hurt him? Only Zim can hurt Dib! She will suffer for this...

"Human! Take me home now!" He hisses, tugging at Dib's shirt and helping his friend off the ground.

When they finally arrive to his house the door is kicked open by his foot and immediately he demands for Dib to wait on the couch while he searches a room. Once returning, he approaches with a mysterious metal box.

Dib tenses nervously as he gets closer.

"Keep those seeing organs of yours shut." Zim instructs. Dib does so hesitantly as Zim gets out something from the box and puts the item itself on the couch beside.

Whatever it is, Dib can't see, until he squints his eyes. No need to fear, it's just a first aid kit.

"You hear me? I want your eyes closed!" Zim snarls, holding a bandaid in one hand. The other goes to grab Dib's shoulder, keeping steady while he positions himself across Dib's lap, putting a leg over each side.

Now sitting comfortably, Zim goes to work on Dib's forehead, cleaning up a tiny injury Dib didn't know he had.

"Don't speak."

"I didn't say-"

"Well now you did! Don't look at Zim!!"

After a couples seconds, the work is finally done.

"There." Zim announces, adjusting the bandaid while Dib opens and rolls his eyes at his dramatics. "I have saved you from death. No need to thank me." He says proudly, brushing Dib's hair out of his face. Then he notices Dib's glasses, damaged from the repulsive worm girl.

Worm girl could end up being his competition, another enemy to fight. Who is she anyway? She is nothing compared to the great invader.

Curiously, he looks through the glasses, attempting to see whatever Dib sees in them. "You broke them. Fortunate for you, Zim will be kind enough to fix your seeing wear."

"Well, she...I mean she pushed me..." Dib starts, but stops and breaks off into a fit of laughter as a alien stares at him through thick lences. "Oh my god, that's so cute!"

"You dare to make fun of Zim?!?!" Zim threatens. It doesn't faze Dib one bit, not when the frown on his face comes off as more of a adorable little pout. 

"Zim is not cute!"

Uh, yeah dude, you kinda are, says Dib's silent look. He doesn't say it, but they are both thinking it.

"Zim is not cute." Zim says again, taking the glasses off and reaching for the humans face. Dib raises his hands, moving to help slide them back on.

Once again they touch, Dib's fingers curling over his. Through broken glasses, Dib bites his lip and stares back a soft look on his face. With a smile, those brillant eyes, through damaged lenses and ruffled hair, are painfully beautiful.

Quickly, Zim removes his hands.

He has some, not a lot, but some knowledge of earthling language. Cute is supposedly a compliment. Whether Dib is only saying to manipulate him as a enemy or if he really genuinely means it is a mystery. 

Stupid Dib thinks hes cute.

Zim can't help but blush at the thought, and makes a sudden noise. He's not sure if it's a purr but realizes Dib is no longer laughing.

Resting his head in the space between Dib's neck and shoulders, he feels the gentleness of Dib's hands rubbing his back and he wishes he could stay like this all day. 

"Zim is not cute." he whispers against the human's skin."Dib thing is."


	8. Chapter 8

As the alien continues to purr against Dib...well. Dib just stays there, staring.

He finally stutters. "I am?"

"Dib is..."

"Yeah, well." Dib blushes. "I guess I am-"

"DIB IS NOT getting his coat back." Zim declares and Dib's smile immediately fades. 

"Oh. Oh, I see how it is."

"It would be foolish to think elsewise."

"If it gets too cold-"

"Surely the weather of your precious planet isn't that bad, weakling." Zim scoffs, brushing Dib's hair away from where the bandaid covers his injury, and mumbles. "You earthlings...such fragile creatures, sensitive to cold climates, even the slightest chill could kill you..."

"Yeah. I'm so fragile." Dib rolls his eyes. "More reason to give me my coat, I'll die of frost bite."

"Don't do that." Zim orders, and presses a gentle kiss to Dib's tiny injury while cupping the human's face with one of his strange alien hands.

Dib quietly still goes still against the couch.

Don't die, Zim had simply ordered, though he didn't completely say it, but a realization comes to mind when he rethinks it. It is an order that Dib thing must follow or else it would break the invaders heart.

The alien's head returns to resting on the human's shoulder. 

In losing his enemy, a part of him would be lost too. He would miss everything.

The touch of their hands tangled together, The sound of Dib's beating heart and the beat Zim's own heart makes when hearing it, All the amusement, the smirking, the teasing and arguments, all the expressions on Dib thing's stupid face. All the feelings, experiences, and stupidness and laughter.

Everything Dib, he would miss. But as an irken, he shouldn't miss anything. 

How could this happen to him, and with a Dib thing, a human who despises him! A enemy despised by irkens! Someone who he's supposed to feel the same mutual hatred towards but he doesn't.

He has to admit to himself now, even if he is going to deny it to anyone else. 

Brain dead Gir, that moron was right. 

But they aren't whatever the irk Gir and everyother idiot on this stupid planet thinks they are. No. Frenemies, is what they are, two enemies in a fake friendship, secretly manipulating each other for information: Dib, trying to stop him from his important mission, and himself, trying to find out Dib's plans.

He has to ignore whatever feelings he's got crawling inside. He can't forget, this is all just a game. Dib doesn't have those feelings, Dib doesn't to want to run away in space with him. He can't let that get to his head, he can't let the enemy win.

Dib doesn't want to be with him.

As much as he fantasizes about Dib giving up his planet for him the probability is unlikely. They could never be together, not like they ever would anyways. If Zim ran away to be with a filthy human, well...every irken knows what happens to traitors. And Dib wouldn't care what happened to him. If anything Dib would feel bad that he didn't get the chance to expose him as the alien he is.

Dib, watching as the irken now removes himself off his lap, tries speaking. But nothing is said.

Zim looks around awkwardly and motions to the door. He'll continue to serve the tallest ones, complete his mission, and as a result, watch earth and all of humanity be destroyed.

Without saying a word, Dib leaves, his mind spinning and wondering what on earth just happened and cursing at himself for the missed opportunity.

Dib touches his forehead to the injury where Zim's kiss was once placed, and quietly he mouths to himself the words he had been too afraid to say eariler. "I want to be with you too."

Should've said it, he thinks. Should've said it, should've said it, should've said it!

Immediately, Dib freezes. 

He left his phone in his coat!! No wonder Zim wanted to keep it, he is probably going through it right now, that sneaky little-ugh! 

Dib groans and stops to kick a fire hydrant in frustration. Bad move, it really doesn't help the situation, only making the walk home incredibly painful. As if Zim kissing his head and kicking him out the house wasn't painful enough.

Either the alien wants to be in a genuine relationship, or he's only doing this whole thing to mess with him and knowing Zim that's the only reason he threw that note. To embarrass Dim.

It just doesn't make sense why he's still keeping up the act...the friend or boyfriend or whatever act it is.

With Zim nothing really makes sense.

"That's it!" Dib shouts in public, though no one around him really cares. "I'm gonna be bold, I'm gonna be brave, I'm gonna do it tomorrow!"

He's going to tell Zim. He's going to tell his enemy, he's going to tell the alien that hates his guts the most and might possibly reject his feelings....yeah.

"Good luck with that." He hears someone mutter as they pass by. Their sarcasm doesn't give him much hope.


	9. Chapter 9

"Lies! It was lies!"

Standing before a mirror with crossed arms, he glares at his disguised face.

He always thought Dib's glasses was just head jewerly made to improve the human seeing organ, but even the great invader couldn't see a thing! Zim said he could fix them, however the human left before he had the chance. In the end, it was a good thing they were broken, dumb Dib was making himself blind by wearing them.

Zim pokes at his contacts and bites his teeth together. His fake eyes, earlier when he put Dib's glasses over them, Dib said he was....

Snarling, he takes them out to reveal his true self. 

Irken, he stares. Behind his contacts, are the eyes of a great invader. Only Dib knows, he's seen him like this many times, with and without the disguise.

Dib said cute when he put the glasses on. The unknown reason why Dib said that drives him crazy. His contacts, if he hadn't been wearing them at the time, would Dib still have said that? If he didn't look so human...

"No!" He screams and rips off his wig. "This is an error, this is wrong, this is a mistake!!!"

Dib said he was cute. Dib didn't mean it, that was to irritate him!

"You! Invader!" He points to the mirror with a alien finger, his other hand shakes furiously at his side and threatening to pull a punch. "What are you doing? Don't be disgusting! He's human! Filthy, icky, earth thing!" he hatefully stomps the wig with his tiny space boots. "Zim doesn't need your approval!"

Yes, yes, Zim is an independent irken who don't need no man! The amazing Zim already knows how charming and attractive he is, what difference would it make being told that from a earthing?! 

Besides the feeling inside him when he hears it from one in particular, that he only wants those words to be told from Dib's lips.

"Zim has no need to look cute for a Dib!!!"

Ready to smack his face in the mirror and convince himself otherwise, he hears the cry of Gir. "Look, look!" The robots skips into the room, waving a book. "Look at what I found!! What do you think it is?"

"GIR!" he shrieks, and yes, it is the flirting book from the library. 

He only kept it because, as dumb as it sounds, he's desperate and has no other option at this point but to seduce the human enemy to his irken charms, only so he can get him to spill all his secrets. He hadn't thought much about it, but now seeing it in Gir's hands he regrets taking it home.

"Don't be reading that!" He screams. "That is for the eyes of Zim only!" 

Gir stares suspiciously at the print on the cover, where it looks like two full body silhouettes are sharing a deep passionate kiss in each other's arms. The robot may have a few screws loose, but he thinks he knows the real reason why Zim has it.

The irken protectively grabs the book and hides it under his arms. It's not what your thinking Gir, the guilty glare on his face says it all.

"Oooh, okay." Not because of the intriguing book cover, got it. 

"The human knows what I'm doing. Hence why he would play along with this stupid friend game. But of course, no one can resist the great zim! He knows the code, I will get him to tell me, with knowledge from this manipulation guide!" Zim explains as he walks. Gir follows him into another room, keeping a observant eye as they enter:

The book, Dib's coat on the living room couch and his master as he sits down and covers the thing over himself. The robot wonders, could his master could be having relationship issues or-

"NO GIR." Zim growls, burying his face in the book. "GO."

"Okays." The robot takes off, though can't help but worry for his master and wonder if Dib's note was still at the place where he last left it.

As the hours pass, the Irken studies the book furiously.

Dib is aware and knows Zim is plotting something for his mission, although honestly with all that's been going on He hadn't the time to sit down and come out with an actual full developed plot on how he'd take over earth...but that's beside the point.

And he had planned to decode the stupid secret note, which idiot Gir unfortunately lost. The note from the Dib, who knows what kind of secrets are hidden among the scribbled language? Sadly he can't really remember what it said, he could've easily translated it into the computer to search up its real meaning.

Hopefully he can find it on the bus ride to school. Maybe he'll get to sit with Dib again. The thought gives him a warm fuzzy feeling, remembering the last bus ride together, but smacks it out of his head. Remember, enemies, Zim. Frenemies. Fake friend enemies. Filthy Dib beast is using you just as you are him.

Zim flings the coat to the floor, deciding he's had too much of it. The coat of Dib is too distracting! And can't get carried away with the enemy!

He opens to a chapter, pulls out a pen and start crossing off a list of advice. Step one and two are already done. So he can go on to the next one.

"Step three." he reads and scoffs. Vulnerability. What a stupid step. 

He remembers when he cornered Dib at the library. How humiliating it was to put himself at such a state, but he loved the look from Dib when he pressed against the human's chest and fluttered his eyes.

Maybe not a stupid step after all, he thinks as he crosses it off the list, though writes a tiny note to the side, that he'll have to keep this in mind next time he wants to brainwash him. Could be useful.

"Laugher, ugh!" Zim furiously scribbles out step four. Useless advice, the human despises his voice. Right? The human despises everything about him.

Step five, flattery. No, he tried that too. 

"Why?! Why?! Must humans be so complicated?!" He screeches as he flips through millions of the pages. Where on irk are the easy steps? "The earthling race is more demanding than I thought it to be." 

He closes the book and scoffs. Who honestly follows such high expectations? Opening doors, holding hands, hugging goodbye, do these things even work!? How would opening a door for someone-

"If there's something strange, in you neighborhood, who you gonna call?" 

The poor startled irken jumps back and whips a frightened stare at the floor.

"Ghostbusters!" a happy voice sings from Dib's coat.

Dib's coat, Zim blinks. It's...alive?

He reaches for the book, and just about ready to go smack the singing coat dead, when he sees a weird bright light coming from a rectangular shape. 

"I ain't afraid of no ghost!"

"Ha!" the Irken bravely stands to confront the coat. "And you think Zim is afraid of you?!" 

The light dies. The singing stops.

"Come out, coward! You can not hide from me!" Zim tosses the coat with a heavy throw. Its a fight easily won. "VICTORY!" He cries, watching the coat falls flat and lifeless to the couch."Victory for Zim!"

But before he can celebrate, something from the coat catches his attention.

Unknowingly, Dib's phone.


	10. Chapter 10

Without his phone alarm clock to awake him, Dib had to make sure he was up early. If he missed the bus ride he wouldn't be able to sit with Zim. And speaking of the little devil, he's already waiting at the bus stop, wearing the same outfit as always, but with Dib's coat added to it.

...Dib is starting to have suspicions.

Little did he know, the alien spent all night snuggling it. And of course with Dib's phone Zim discovered selfies. But he had yet to discover how to delete them, causing millions of pictures to be saved to Dib's photo gallery. Zim was in all of them.

"Dib!" When he approaches, the alien snarls at him before he can say hello. "Been spying, haven't we?" 

"Huh?" Dib has spied on him many times in the past but has no idea what he's talking about now.

"The photos?" Zim narrows his eyes. Once the irken couldn't figure out how to delete selfies, he was mortified. So many ugly pictures that the Dib would find! Of course the great Zim knew how handsome he was himself, but Dib didn't. These pictures would only convince the human he was even more ugly.

Zim doesn't want to look ugly for Dib.

And after all the things he'd looked up on google: "dating advice for enemies" and "a hundred ways to be more cute" and "how attract a human if your an alien," he knew he couldn't return it without destroying its search history. The phone itself was left at his house, where he would dispose of it later.

"Look, lizard." Dib begins. "I haven't done anything! Don't just accuse me of-"

"You...!!" Zim cuts him off, shaking his arms angerliy. "You lie! Last night!" he flaps the sleeves of the coat around. "You know what you did, the thing you hid in Zim's coat!!!"

"In my coat. That was my phone." Dib corrects and narrows his eyes. He hadn't intended to leave it in there and of course Zim would go through it. Now, for some reason, Zim thinks he's been spying on him. Great.

"I didn't do anything. Those photos, that's just something phones do."

"The phone is alive, Dib." Zim hisses. "Sings, it sings! How do you explain?!"

"That..." Dib blinks."That was my ringtone."

"Ha." Zim scoffs. "It was a disturbance."

Dib decides he really can't disagree with Zim's statement. The ghostbusters theme song isn't exactly music to his ears and just when he wonders what else Zim discovered about his phone, a evil idea comes to mind.

"Hm. Yeah. Okay." He grins. "Tell you what. All the photos, I'll delete them."

"Yes you will, Dib thing." Zim squints his eyes."Yes you will. And you will suffer the consequences for your act-"

"Ah!" Dib waves a finger. "Say you like me."

Zim's mouth drops. Slyly, Dib steps forward, his grin ten times wide. "Say it and I won't show a single soul."

"No!" Zim backs up against the stop sign as Dib moves a little closer. "That's blackmail! This isn't fair! Dib, you cheater! Zim only tolerates his enemy!"

Dib leans against the sign with a arm and smirks down at the wide eyed irken. Zim swallows nervously. 

"Heck, I won't even look at them." Dib promises.

"No! No, Dib thing!" the invader screams. "No! Delete them! Do not look, do not see!" 

"Okay now I'm intrigued."

"You...You will pay, you will suffer for this!" The invader growls and points a threatening hand to his chest. 

"Oh. I know." Dib's voice lowers in a incredible way. Zim stares at the smile on his lips as he says it. "Come on. Do it for me, space boy."

The irken hesitates but he has no other choice. He looks away, mumbling as quiet as he can. "....You."

"What was that? Couldn't quite catch it."

"Zim...You."

"Little louder."

The Irken yells as loud as he can. "Zim really likes you! Zim really likes you! Zim likes the Dib!" 

Embarrassed, he buries his face in his trench coat. Dib's coat, of course. He wouldn't be wearing it if it wasn't Dib's but he can't hide in there forever. 

When he peeks up he sees Dib still leaning over him. There's a satisfied expression on his face and a look as if he's just figured something out.

"Aww. How sweet. The Dib really likes you too." he winks.

The irken's face burns. No. That can't be right. They are enemies. Stop playing around, Dib! The Dib thing doesn't even like Zim.

The bus arrives soon.

Everyone gets on, and once again, the two end up in the same seat together. If they are enemies then why, Zim thinks, if they hate each other then why does something inside the irken ache so much? 

On the ride to school he doesn't have time to look for the lost note/secret code. He's too busy focusing on other things. 

The painful feeling he gets thinking about Dib hating him. The sad feeling he gets thinking about Dib being in pain. The angry feeling he gets thinking about Dib talking to other people. The happy feeling he gets thinking about Dib being with him.

Whatever feeling it is. Mostly, just the Dib thing.


	11. Chapter 11

It didn't bother him that Zim wanted to wear his coat. Really, there was a sense of pride in it. Zim wearing something that was his, it was like a trophy, that the irken belonged to Dib. Seeing Zim take joy in it made him smile.

But this is gym class and Zim is running around the football field in a coat that's probably ten times heavier and bigger than his actual size.

"Okay. Now this." He points out as the small invader tries to keep up on his tiny little legs. "This is ridiculous!"

"No....this...I am Zim!" Zim simply pants, uncontrollably out of breath. The coat drags behind his every step. Dib's not worried about it getting dirty, more concerned for his friend's actual health.

"Oh come on! Really, take it off!"

"The great Zim...will do as...he please!"

Dib isn't the fastest or weakest in his class, but even if he has the ability to continue running, he's not going to leave Zim behind to suffer alone.

As Zim's steps decrease, Dib slows down to match his speed. While the teachers are busy yelling at the students, he decides to take the opportunity before the stupid alien possibly faints.

"Your an idiot, you know?" He huffs and glances around before scooping up the tired irken in his arms. 

Zim hatefully growls something, which Dib only assumes is a alien language, a long sentence of Irken insults. But surprisingly, he isn't struggling or trying to kick away. Instead, he clings to Dib's neck and shoulders as he is lifted and carried away in a bridal style.

"Zim...hates... His english returns through small mumbles, though he drops that sentence when Dib almost trips over something in the middle of the grass. "Dib!" Zim screams, clinging against the human for dear life. "Don't, don't drop-!!" he shuts his eyes, wincing. "Dib-!!!"

However Dib doesn't trip, and without dropping any of the precious cargo he continues to cross the field.

Zim opens his eyes, and snarls at the smirk on Dib's face. "Zim hates you!"

"Oooh, I think I'm gonna fall again!" Dip teases, pretending to loose balance. "Watch out, I could drop you!" 

"You pig!" Zim hisses. Dib smiles. "You wouldn't dare!"

"Oh no!" Dib wiggles the irken in his arms. Quickly Zim's glare is wiped away in exchange of fear. "Gotta hold on to me, don't let go!"

"No, Dib thing, no!" Zim screams, and clings closer in need of protection. Though Dib is walking more carefully, he has no intentions of dropping him. He's got no plans of continuing gym class either.

Minutes later and still no one has realized they've disappeared under the school's bleachers. 

After calming down and catching their breaths, Dib helps Zim out of his coat and spreads the clothing wide across the grass. "Uh, ew." The irken crosses his arms with a very upset frown. Now the coat of the Dib is tainted by filth soil.

"Look, no dirt, no ants." Dib says thoughtfully, lying down and patting a spot for him.

Zim cringes. "The thought of touching your icky earth planet!" He snarls, makes gross face, and shivers. "Disgusting!"

"It's nice down here." Dib insists as he shuts his eyes and rests his hands on his shirt. He looks peaceful, just enjoying the cool air. "I'd like it if you'd join. It's great."

Though he's not convinced, the Irken relaxes next to him, his back against the coat and his face slightly turns towards Dib.

Dib's lips, Zim notices, are not like his. With a smile the Irken has never seen before, the human's entire face is something different. Zim gazes, longingly.

Happiness, is that what Dib thing is feeling? He's desperate to know and wonders if he himself is feeling it too. There's always something inside him when he's around his Dib. Could that be what it is?

Dib's eyes open, he turns and notices the alien's stare.

Finding himself in a drooling daze, Zim closes his mouth. Then opens it again to say something quickly. But he's speechless and struck with wonder, realizing the smile on the human's lips are now pointed at him.

Does Zim...make him happy?

Still smiling, Dib rolls over on his side and moves a hand. Feeling brave, Zim reaches to hold it. 

"Dib," he lowers his eyes, observing its strange texture before bringing the hand to mouth. Gently touching the back of the palm, in almost a kiss, he whispers against Dib's skin.

"You are a despicable human worm."

"Adorable." Dib says with his most coolest smile. Zim quickly turns to his other side, realizing his own expression is being seen.

"So...." Smoothly, Dib wraps a arm around him and moves a little closer. "Still mad?"

Feeling the touch of the hand again, he slides the human's fingers in his own alien ones. Although after Dib doing all those annoying things part of him wants to bite them all off as punishment. But he won't. Because secretly he never wants to let to go.

"Zim sees your still despicable." the Irken closes his eyes. 

Half an hour of napping later and the two wake up to the sound of students chattering nearby. Gym is almost over.

They both sigh, comfortable, not wanting the leave the others side.

Dib doesn't skip school, but considering next hours art class he wonders if maybe they can get away with hanging out underneath the bleacher again, no one would probably even notice or care.

"Dib thing?" Zim says, his voice a little quiet.

'Yeah?" 

"Zim is..." he tries to ask the human, who is now apparently cuddling him, or transforming his body into what the humans call a big spoon. The irken learned that information from the library book, but he didn't really believe humans could shapeshift into kitchen silverware. 

"Zim is your..." the irken mumbles too low for the human to hear. "Is Zim your..."

"What?"

"What is zim to you?" Zim finally asks, its a question that's been on his mind for a while. Friend? Enemy? Frenemy, Fake friend enemy? What are they if they aren't any of those things?

Dib wondered this too. "What do you want to be?" 

Zim can't see the hope on the face behind him, or the hope on his own face for that matter. In their hearts both know what they want to say. Neither know how to respond.


	12. Chapter 12

Zim sighs, and rolls over on his side, once again facing the Dib.

Dib's smile, has slightly disappeared. The expression on his face is unreadable to the alien. If only he knew what Dib was thinking.

One of them has to say something. Cowardly, he hides his face. If it has to be him, he doesn't want to look Dib in the eyes. In a alien language, he speaks...

"There's no idea, not a clue inside that big fat beautiful head of yours. As smart as you are, Dib, your too stupid to understand!"

Dib knows perfectly well its not English, but the silence from his voice is literally killing the invader. Dib can't hear him, doesn't know what he's saying, and it's almost perfect. Everything Zim wants to say, everything he feels, he's about to spill.

Spilling his whole tiny little irken heart out, it's perfect because Dib can't hear it hurting. But that's what makes it not so perfect too. He needs Dib to hear. He wishes Dib could understand. He wants Dib to feel the same.

"Why are you like this, dib? Huh? Why do you tease Zim? Huh, huh?! Why, why do you hurt, so much...It's not fair, your the enemy...You shouldn't be the cause of all these...horrid...feelings of...happiness!" He shouts, still hiding his face.

He doesn't want it to be seen, even though Dib doesn't understand the irken language that he's speaking, part of him doubts and fears.

"Oh." He sighs. "Dib. You....wanna know, what Zim wants to be?"

"Zim wants to be yours, Dib thing." He says, though he never begs for anything, his heart demands this.

"Imagine that, the greatest invader of all, and some stupid human." Zim whispers. Dib's hand snakes his way up his arm, trying to comfort him.

Feeling brave, he opens his eyes.

"Ha! Feels as if Zim is...Stopping look like that!" he shouts.

Dib's beautiful smile returns. Zim wants to smack it off his face yet at the same time, to kiss his lips and soak up all their beauty. With Dib thing, doing so would be impossible.

"I don't know anything about what you said." the human laughs, something sparkling in his eyes.

Enemies don't look at each other like this, Zim thinks. It should be glares of hate not with gazes of....

Love. It feels as if the great invader Zim is in love.

Zim huffs, this in english time "Absolutely, moron." 

Suddenly, they hear the sound of a group heading their way both slightly panic.

Football players.

"Oh no, quick! Hide, go go!" Dib whispers, pulling the alien up and dragging him by the wrist. Zim hisses at the touch. 

"Dib you-"

"Sh-!! Be quiet!" Dib hushes as they make their way to where a small closet stands on the opposite side of the bleachers.

A janitor closet, the school kept cleaning things there, but maybe you could find a old football or something strangely unusual. Like the time Dib was locked in overnight by the football team, he'd found the nest where the school lunch meat liked to lay their eggs. Hopefully Dib won't have to suffer through that again.

The two slide inside and the door instantly closes behind. It won't lock by itself, not without a key.

"Here." Dib says, moving a couple brooms around to fit in the tight space. A dust pan accidentally falls off a shelf and hits Zim on the head.

"Pain! Zim feels pain!" He groans, trying to push Dib off, the attempt only causes the human to smack against the wall.

"Ow!" Dib winces, and grabs him by the shirt. "Shut up! They can hear-" A sudden fear fills Dib's eyes as the door knob starts to turn. "Get down!" He whispers, letting go and quickly sitting to the floor.

Zim gets down on his knees and puts his hands on the wall, right above Dib's shoudlers.

"Uh," Realizing he can't back up further and Zim is literally blocking his body from moving, Dib curses. 

"Huh, door must be jammed. Hey, anyone got a key or something?" Says a voice right outside the door.

The only thing they can do is wait for them to leave.

"Yeah, I've got a something!" Says another voice.

Oh no.

Quickly, Dib shoves his foot hard against the door, to prevent anyone from opening it. Whomever it is, he's not taking the chances of being locked in the closet with the school's angry lunch meat. Not happening again.

"Zim." Dib whispers. Zim stares, lost in the human's eyes. He is stunning for a human, and if Zim didn't despise his species he'd almost be jealous. Dib has a intensely amazing stare, and those eyes of his, Zim never wants them to look away.

If only he looked more human. If only he could pass as an earthling then maybe Dib would think the same of him too, and if he was really human, maybe they would never have been enemies.

Maybe they would've been lov-

"What happened your contacts?" Dib breathes, fingers reaching to stroke the aliens cheeks. His broken glasses are almost fogging from the hot space between them,

"Oh." Zim blinks and coughs to clear away the happy purring from his throat. "Uh, ahem. I...Uh, I must've lost them."

"Yes, well." Dib nods, looking away through his heated glasses. Taking his hand away, he pushes them up his nose. "That's troubling isn't it..."

"Zim must find them."

"So I'll have to help. Once we...uh." Dib looks back into the aliens stare.

"Oh." Zim opens his mouth. "Uh. Well yes, Zim does see this position is..."

"You look good without them." Dib whispers, biting his lip. 

Zim is almost ready to die.

The door knob starts to move again. "I think it's almost open!" Someone outside yells. Once again, Dib shoves his foot in the door place to stop them.

Steadying himself against the floor, Zim wraps his arms around the human. In return, Dib places his hands on him, scooting the alien closer. As Zim hides his face against the human's neck, he wonders if today was the most he's ever seen of Dib, the most he's ever seen Dib smile.

"I think it's locked. Too bad I left something in there. Come on, let's go."

Dib sighs in relief. 

The irken, staying still in the arms of Dib, also sighs, and nuzzles closer for comfort. "Dib." He breathes against his skin.

Dib stays still, thinking and slowly he starts to get a clue. All day, he has been suspicious. Sure, maybe Dib was a little oblivious, but he sees it now. Zim is just being shy, or perhaps, he's playing hard to get.

"Yes?"

"Your a worm."

"I know." Dib smiles. Tonight, is gonna be his chance. He's gonna ask Zim about the note.


	13. Chapter 13

After school Zim had invited him over so he could get his phone. 

Zim also said Dib needed his glasses fixed, since they were a little damaged, and while the alien was trying his best to fix them in the other room, Dib stood and waited patiently. He'd been standing for so long enough that the table in front of him it looked as if it was about to stare back. Zim, despite what the tiny green terror said, told him not to go in the kitchen yet he did so anyways. 

Now Dib sees why he wanted him to stay out. Pictures, so many pictures of himself are spread across the kitchen table. Photographs of Dib.

Some aren't even pictures Dib realizes, noticing one of his old pens lying onto a few pieces of collected papers.

The pen, was a thin sharpie brand. Dib remembered it from last year because he used it on the irken while he was asleep. It was only a harmless test, just to see how well his skin could absorb the material...and not because he wanted to draw little alien faces on the back of his elbows. And since Zim couldn't really wash it off, both his arms were covered with little doodles of stars, planets and tiny spaceships. He was surprised Zim had kept it, Dib thought he'd thrown it away.

As his eyes scan over the table, he sees more than just old items and useless junk. Most of them are memories.

One that catches his eye is part of a art collab they were forced to do together for valentines day. The assignment was to draw something nice about your group partner on a paper shaped heart. Being unable to cooperate they ending up tearing the paper in half and turning them in separately. Looking at the torn collab, he laughs. It was funny that Zim kept his half of the heart. Dib did kept his too.

Strangely, Zim's habit of hoarding all this information makes him feel relived. As much of a stalker Dib is, having his fair share of spying and hoarding information, he's glad to know he's not the obsessive one in the relationship.

If it's even a relationship yet but whatever it is, they have yet to talk about it. Zim could be too nervous, so that just leaves Dib in charge. He wasn't sure at first, but now everything so becoming more clear. Zim is shy. Dib needs to break the ice. But how is he going to...

Looking back at the pen, a brilliant idea comes to mind. He grabs it, takes a seat, and with smug grin he begins to write a message across the table. If Zim is smart enough to think he can fool Dib with his irken language, then surely he'll be smart enough to figure out what Dib really wants, if Zim's computer can translate Spanish of course.

There's no going back now, he thinks and for the finishing touch, he jots down his phone number on the table with by a couple of hearts around it. Probably too cheesy but Zim is Irken, alien's probably don't care about that stuff.

Looking at it, the realization hits him that the marker might rub off the table when he's gone. Probably not, but if by chance Zim rejects him then who knows, the alien could have his number stuck on his kitchen table forever. Or Zim might never see it and might never call to ask about it.

No. He shakes the thought away. Zim WILL see this. And Zim WILL NOT reject him.

"Oh yeah." Proudly assuring himself, he puts his hands on his hips and stares down at the table with a confident smile. He's never asked anyone out before and probably neither has Zim....except for the note Zim threw at him....but it makes Dib feel cool pretending to be the first.

Taking the torn half of the art collab, he covers it over the spot he wrote on the table and he clears the area around it so that Zim can see it in plain sight. Incase its not obvious, the paper heart lying on top of the message should remind him who it's from.

"Dib, you baffoon, you complete imbecile moron, I told you-" 

"Yeah. I got it." Dib grins as he steps out of the kitchen. From his small height, the invader marches right up to the human and glares.

"Dib." Zim huffs. "What did Zim say about-?"

"I know, I know." Dib interrupts, defensively holding up his hands."Stay in the kitchen."

"That is not what Zim TOLD YOU to do."

"Oh right." Dib smirks at the cute little frown on the tiny green alien. "I just found your little hobby quite...fascinating! Your such a fan, didn't think you'd mind sharing."

"What...did...Dib.. see....." Zim hisses.

Dib shrugs. "Can't see anything unless I got glasses."

"You lie." Zim grumbles as he takes out the broken eye accessories he supposedly fixed. "Now lean."

Dib does so, leaning over so that his face is low enough for Zim slide them back on.

"There." The alien says, satisfied.

"Wait! These aren't fixed, you made them worse!"

"Of course Zim did! After all-Er,I mean, Zim fixed them! You can be thankful." Zim waves a hand.

"Well..." Dib sighs. "What do you think?"

Not even staring at him, Zim shrugs. "Think your head is still big, Dib-pig,"

"Yeah, Well. Your still-hey, wait!" He adjusts his eyes, seeing something lying on the couch, and walks over to investigate. "Hey is...Is that-Is this what I think it is?" Dib laughs, as he picks it up. "Oh wow it is!"

The flirting book from the library, Zim was really reading it!!

"Human!" Zim charges towards him like an angry cat and tries to grab it. "Put it down! Zim demands you put it down!" he snarls, flinging his hands in the air while attempting to tiptoe himself higher.

Laughing, Dib holds the book way above his head so the poor little thing can't reach. As he does, a bunch of Zim's flirting notes slip out from the page.

The irken watches in horror as they fall to the floor and land by Dib's feet. Curious, Dib picks out a piece of paper stuck between chapter pages. "OOH, Zim!" He gasps evilishly. "What are these...."

"Don't read those!!!" Zim screams. "Those aren't for your eyes-"

"Ahh, these are..." Dib smirks, holding the paper in front of him."Zim, are these kissing techniques?"

"NO!" Zim growls. Complete denial.

Well...I mean..." Dib raises an eyebrow and checks the paper one more time, just making sure. "They do look like techniques." 

Most certainly, Zim has been studying.

"So. Do you wanna try them out?" He looks to Zim with a big grin.

"Give them back, Dib!" Zim demands, now trying to snatch the book through high jumps. Only unsuccessfully.

"But I can be your guinea pig!!!" Dib sings. "Come on, Zim. I can let you practice!" 

Unamused, Zim crosses his arms and glares up at him from his low height. "Dib thing is already a pig." He huffs, then looking away, mutters to himself. "Zim doesn't practice experiments on test subjects, if he's fond of them."

"Oh. I see..." Dib smiles, lowering the book low enough just enough for Zim to grab it. "Not gonna share your knowledge with me, huh Zim?"

"Ha!" Zim scoffs, trying to swipe it out of the Dib's grasp. But the book is raised, and lowered once again. Zim isn't falling for it this time. "Your puny human brain wouldn't be able to comprehend my superior irken knowledge!"

"Wanna bet on it?" Dib wiggles his eyebrows.

Zim rolls his eyes and scoffs. "Zim has no need."

Finally, he lets go of the book with a wide smirk. "Don't tell me your scared."

"The great Zim is never scared."

"Why not?" Dib says smoothly as he leans over to cup Zim's face with a hand.

"B-Because!" Eyes wide with surprise, Zim turns away his face to hide a blushed look. "Zim said so...and Dib too close!!" 

So cute, Dib thinks as his thumb brushes against Zim's cheek. 

"And..." Zim's eyes shyly make their way back to his, but only to close at the Dib's gentle touch. "Your a stupid Dib pig." Zim whispers, running alien fingers run along his trench coat.

"Yeah, I know." Dib pulls him closer and smiles at the invader's soft expression, its a look that he likes to see. "I'm your stupid Dib pig."


	14. Chapter 14

Dib's words make him shiver. 

"Pshh! Obviously." 

That's right, Dib is his. Dib is Zim's stupid Dib pig. 

"Dib thing is always a pig."

"Yeah, and that's exactly..." Dib says in a low beautiful voice, his eyes handsomely gazing at the invader. "Why I think..." Cupping Zim's face with both hands, Dib's movements cause their foreheads to touch. "We should."

At the same time, they both close their eyes. Just to simply take in the moment, the preciousness of being with each other.

"Zim."

The Irken sighs at the sound. He reaches for Dib's hands, tempted to remove them. Just to see a reaction. 

But he is reminded why he's not going to. It's moments like these Zim never wants to let go of. Even the smallest unimportant things are so big and special. Only because this is Dib and because he is here with him.

A small part of him worries it's trap. Being so vulnerable like this around the enemy, or fake friend, or frienemy, whatever, Dib could take out his handcuffs at any time and kidnap him, use this sweet shared moment to his advantage, only to break the alien's heart and show him to the world.

But with this feeling he forgets everything, being enemies, his home planet, his entire mission. Only like this, can he forget.

Right now, Dib's warm beautiful embrace is all he can think of. He only wants to be in his arms, the comfort of his Dib.

Never mind his mission, every minute he spends on earth without Dib is a waste. These moments, Sometimes, they feel too rare. Sometimes too much but never enough. He longs for more. More gentleness of the Dib. More preciousness. More moments like this, sharing them together with gazes of admiration.

"Hey, lizard?"

When Zim opens his eyes at the mention of the horrid nickname, his heart flutters at what he sees. Dib, perfect a smile on his lips, a look of the same longing. Hopefully, Zim thinks. He hopes this gorgeous sight is longing. Please, let Dib want what he wants.

"Te amo." Dib whispers. It's a saying that they both share, though Zim doesn't understand it's meaning....Te amo, I love you.

"And?" Zim narrows his eyes, expecting an explaination. Could this be a joke? Another secret code, some kind of sick message?

Dib grins back at him.

"Don't look like that!" Zim slightly snarls. "You nuisance! You must tell Zim."

The grin gets wider.

Zim huffs angrily. But with a face like that, he's unable to stay upset for long and thinks. What does it mean? 

Hmm... Maybe try. "Teee..." He tries his hardest to pronounce. "T...Tea. Tah-ee."

"Ta eeee! T!!" Trying to stand a little higher, he rubs the spot of where his nose would against Dib's. Even though he doesn't have one, he can still try eskimo kisses. "Tee ahh mo!" He declares, believing himself that he's pronounced it. "TEE AH MOE! Ha! Victory for-"

Dib chokes on a strange sound in his throat and pulls away.

"What?!" Zim narrows his eyes and swallows nervously at the sight of dib covering his mouth from all the squealing and noises escaping his throat.

Did Zim say it wrong? Was the eskimo kiss that bad? But the flirting techniques said it was a form of kissing...ugh! Never trust a advice from a book that says touching noses is-

"Oh wow that was just."

Dib, he realizes suddenly, is now badly hiding a small giggle. Laugher, humans make it when they like something, right? Well, Dib's laughter, Zim thinks, staring at where the source of the sound comes from, he kinda likes his idiotic voice.

"Silence." the alien hisses. "Your horrible dying noises make you hideous. Do not mock Zim!"

"Oh, no, I kinda thought it was..." Dib scratches his head and looks away. Zim's eyes widen. No. Oh no. Don't say it.

Turning his head to stare back at the invader, Dib covers a smile. Oh no...

"Dib thing!" Zim hisses, feeling warm as Dib pulls him a little closer. He's going to say it. It's the word, he's going call Zim cute, or adorable, or something or that'll make Zim blush and purr like an embarrased-

"Te amo." 

Before Zim can even comprehend what's happening, Dib's arms wrap around the small alien for a kiss.

Not, its not a kiss, Zim realizes once he finally feels the touch he's been waiting for. Well, that was lie. It is a kiss actually, but it's not only just that. This is another shared moment. Something to remember, and memories, just like time, can slip by so easily. The takes the opportunity and grabs it by the trench coat, there's not a second to waste any longer. Not when he could waste the rest of his life with this human.

Humans don't have many brain cells, Zim thinks, biting back into their kiss. They don't think like irkens do, so while Zim is likely to remember this moment for the rest of his life, Dib might forget.

No, Zim yanks the collar of Dib's shirt. That will never happen. Fake friends? Enemies? Friends? Frenemies? Whatever they are, doesn't matter. What Zim feels in this kiss he knows the Dib thing feels too.

He knows, he can feel it in his heart.

Zim didn't expect this to happen. But it is the most lovely experience, and now knowing that he, the great invader Zim, is the cause of this human's happiness, he can't let Dib forget how much he means to him.

The kiss is broken with two gasps, a smug smirking human, and struggling to speak alien.

"Dib.." he stuttered, looking away with a flustered hot face. "Ta-eee....Dib-Tee."

"Yeah." Dib breathes. "I know, Zim."

"Te amo." Together, they pronounce it. The word feels like it has so much meaning, only because it's from his Dib's lips. 

Yes, Zim's thinks. They are his lips now, tainted with Zim. No one else can touch them.

"What does that mean?"


End file.
